I just saw a bumper sticker that read “Love Your Mother” with a picture of Earth next to it.

I thought it read “I love Your Mother.” I was like WTF? You don’t even know my mother (who I am sure is imminently loveable but nonetheless).

I suppose it could have read “I love your brother.” Like in the union brother kind of way. Or just a plain brotherly love kind of thing

Or “I love your dog.” I think I would have been pretty comfortable with “I love your dog.” I don’t even have a dog, but I am sure it would be a super lovable dog.

I mean, I know “I love your mother (or my brother or whatever)” would not explicitly be about me.

But the whole idea seems a little invasive or presumptive. I do have some boundaries, even if I know they’re there to be broken. I mean, I don’t even know you and here you are loving someone close to me. I’m a little taken back to tell the truth.

I love you. I would be much more comfortable with just “I love you” period. At least I am in control of the situation. I can accept your love or not. I can return it or not. I don’t have to bring any third parties into the equation. Third parties make things complicated.

Yes, I know it could be some unconditional love being thrown out there. But unconditional love is usually reserved for babies and dogs as far as I am concerned. So keep your unconditional love to your self. I want to earn the love I get.

I mean, what’s a good emotion really given unconditionally? Respect? No, you have to earn that too. Hate? Definitely shouldn’t be unconditionally dishing that out.

How about trust? Hmm. Maybe not a great idea, but perhaps you would only be putting yourself at risk, so maybe there’s not much harm in that.  Hmm.

“I trust you.” That might be a good bumper sticker. I might even be comfortable with “I Trust your mother.”

Or maybe “Trust Your Mother” next to a picture of Earth. I can unconditionally do that.