The Emperor’s New Food



Imaginary Chicken Broth. Brilliant. Imaginary chicken broth, i.e. vegetarian broth, is fun, catchy word play. Good angle by the vegetarian crowd.

At least that’s what I thought the label said, whereas in fact it actually was chicken broth, the brand name being Imagine.

Then I thought Imaginary is good but they should call it The Emperor’s Chicken Broth because then it wouldn’t even have to be broth at all but maybe just fortified salt water, like placebo broth.

Our mind can play tricks on us and we can play tricks on our mind, so why not placebo cooking. Is the power of suggestion stronger than the power of our senses?

Placebo cooking. You order some food at a fancy restaurant and the chef comes out and explains what he has just prepared for you. “Here is our wonderful soup of the day, a cream chicken leek asparagus puree made with our own homemade chicken stock with a dash of coriander and some chives sprinkled on top. Enjoy.”

And you try it and it is wonderful. And you think it is everything the chef promised.

The cook is in the back laughing. “Ha! There is no chicken stock at all in the soup. I used the Emperor’s Chicken Broth. So much cheaper and healthier.”

So in order to get people to eat healthier we need placebo cooking.  You tell them how good it is going to be and exactly what it will taste like. Play tricks on their minds. In other words, lie to them.

You can’t lie to the people, you say. But it’s for their own good. They won’t even know it. What you don’t know won’t hurt you.

And think of it. The placebo foods will be fortified with all the nutrients the people need. We’ll all be healthier.

But then if we are going to trick the people’s minds we’ll have to come up with different brand names. Imaginary just gives the trick away and too many people will get the Emperor’s reference.

I’ll leave that to the brilliant PSYOP people. They’ll know what to do.

About joegergen

To evoke a smile. That's all. Author of "Methane Wars: A Fable" and "Lear's Fool" as well as various poems and some these painting things as well.
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